When I was 48, nearly 49 – 48 and 3/4s to put it in my 4 yr old granddaughter’s parlance – I got very sick. I was off work with tummy issues to continue the syntax. Basically I was going at both ends and lost about 30kg (sorry my US friends, you’ll have to do the maths here – not my forte!) over 6 months. I’d been to my GP, had X-rays and bloods and anything we could think of. Good news! It wasn’t cancer, even better news! I could definitely afford to lose the weight 😏
Then at the beginning of January 2021 my colon burst.
I didn’t know that of course. I know things were bad, I’d been to the GP on Monday and A&E (Accident and Emergency – ER basically) on Tuesday, and Wednesday & Thursday I decided to self medicate by drinking a lot of Vodka. In fact I know Thursday night I was on the phone to mum because actually the vodka wasn’t helping! Friday morning, about 6am, I got up and went to the toilet. When I clambered up to bed (long story, will explain much later) something went pop. It wasn’t an audible pop I don’t think? But it was a visceral pop. The pain was insane. I staggered out onto the deck, it was much more comfortable to sit with my knees tucked around my ears when I sat on the stairs than to try standing. Something was really wrong, but I was sure it too would pass. I rang my friend up the road, who also is not a morning person and she told me so in no uncertain terms 🥰 I just said, once I could – Rhonda? Something’s wrong. She said shit, I’ll be right there. She rang an ambulance before she left her house. And that probably saved my life.
So yeah. Bowel perforated, body was already in distress – they kept asking me at the hospital when I’d last eaten. I knew this as it was a mince pie on Tuesday and it violently evicted from my body very very quickly.
Then there were lots of drugs. Like LOTS. I’m not complaining about that – the pain was unbelievable. But it meant that when I was giving consent for them to fix what was going on I really wasn’t able to take it in. Again – not going to argue, it was necessary and urgent and I get that. But the last thing I really remember was that call to Rhonda on Friday morning. And when I woke up on Monday morning it was to a nurse, with a bag telling me that this is something I would have to do myself now. WTAF?
It was awful. And I can only be very very grateful to the colonoscopy nurse as she had expected a level of knowledge I REALLY didn’t have and she took me back to basics with grace, kindness and understanding. I mean all the nurses were awesome, but that poor woman was lead to believe (because I’m great at nodding and smiling) I had a level of knowledge that it was very quickly patently clear I did not. And didn’t want to. Though I sucked that up pretty damned quick because I also didn’t want anyone else in there doing shit. Literally.
This has become a verbal dump I didn’t expect tbh. Was going to talk more about middle age-hood and well – menopause. But I didn’t get menopause. I had this happen and have had two very short periods since then (I’m now 52). I definitely haven’t had a period in the last two years. I’m not even sure if I’m having hot flushes or it’s actually hot – I think the latter as the “hot flush” lasts more than an hour and apparently that’s not how hot flushes work. Anyhoo!
Point is that this was going to be about my menopausal experience and how very glad I am not to have someone around that I have to make feel better while going through stuff. But it became a different experience. I was going to delete it. But I won’t. Just in case someone out there is in the same place I was and maybe can get a better heads up? Maybe?
The pics are me in January 2020 and then me in March 2021. Only I can’t upload them as I need to change my plan. Which I will do. Once I’ve got myself sorted.
BlueKahu 